From Bath to Cork with Baby Grace

My top three:

Aveda Liquid Pomade - fantastic for any man’s hair after a wash, gives really soft curls

Our Grannies’ Recipes - by Eoin Purcell and friends at Mercier Press

and …

"I had a Black Dog" - by Matthew Johnstone : the ultimate filler for anyone who’s had severe depression or helped someone through it or who may do that next year.

There’s a book in this ’series’ which I can’t wait to get :

Hurry, rush, the race is on:

Christmas time, it won’t be long.

You can’t put off this happy day,

it’s almost on us, here to stay.

The list must do, there’s no more space,

last-minute panic on my face.

Where’s my money, lost my cheque book:

if this goes on, no time to cook.

Why can’t this be like other feasts?

Moveable, looseable, cruiseable beasts.

Hurry, worry, more strain again,

Santa’s banter, Ho Ho bright pain.

And all along the streets I spy

children waiting, smiles in the eye.

Course:   Applied Digital Photography         

Venue:           UCC

Lecturer(s)/Co-ordinator: Stephen Bean/Regina Sexton

Comments: please comment on the following:

1. What did you like about the lecture sessions?

First, the style: relaxed, humorous, a bit sloppy, unpolished and edgy, thought-provoking, opinionated and friendly, at time charmingly unsure of how he was coming across.

Second, the challenge to think about photography from the point of view of the fundamentals: not so much a digital photography lecture as a photography lecture.  Wonderfully succinct and inviting me to think deeper into my practice.  I found myself asking myself questions during lectures, questions like ‘what assumptions am I making about the nature of image making? What’s the difference between what my eye sees, what the camera sees and what I can let the camera see? What do I want to photograph?  What’s my style of photographing? What’s it becoming? What do I really think of image bending and editing?  What do I know about what went on in darkrooms?

Third, the ease with which the lecturer took and encouraged questions.  The way in which he didn’t cut me off even when I had loads of unasked questions?  How he thereby cultivated my curiosity.

2. Where [typpo?] you satisfied with the course content and its delivery?

Very satisfied. 

3. Where you satisfied with the level of individual or group participation?

 Yes

4. What improvements you would like to see made or what suggestions for improvement can you make?

When presenting PhotoShop: don’t write on blackboard.  Instead use projector to show what is seen on computer screen.  Get one of those infrared beamers to point round the projection.

Speak out instructions in a particularly loud voice: I’m ‘hard of hearing’ and found it too difficult to follow the editing sessions, so I spent my time purposely enjoying the opportunity to study various photographers.

Make it clear at the start what relationship, if any, exists between this course and a certified course.  Maybe also give a synopsis of what’s covered on a degree course – I’m thinking of  doing some further study of photography.

5. Did the course match your needs and expectations?

Yes and no.  It met my needs and exceeded my expectations.

6. If this course was offered for credit would you be more or less inclined to enrol of the programme? Please explain your answer.

Yes.  I’d go out of my way to study with Stephen Bean.

We cooked yesterday.  We ate with good friends last night.

• Toasted bread rubbed with garlic, topped with tapenade and tomato, grilled - as nibbles

• Mixed olives and gerkins - as nibbles

• Drunk down with Grifon Prosecco (northeastern Italy, sprakling wine, made by the Charmat method)

• Buffalo Mozzarella, fat tomatoes and basil, with olive oil from Puglia, Italy (The Real Olive Company)

• Cork beef (O’Mahony’s @ English Market) from the rib, cooked very rare, with a gravy simmered for hours

• Broccoli and green beans, steamed

• The best-looking roast potatoes I’ve ever made & seen

• Brie de Melun,  and two goats’ cheeses - from Abbeyfeale & Charleville

• A Billy McAssey (spelling?) from Douglas lemon cheesecake with Murphy’s Chocolate ice cream

• Two bottles  : Chateau Bois de Cadet 2005 (80% Merlot, 20% Cabernet Sauvignon) & Chateau Tourenne 2006 - thank you David.

• Biscuits & sweets

• One half glass of Redbreast (12 years old) before bed.

I know Adrian & Cindy enjoyed it.  The meat was too rare for the Wiffe.  I was in my element.

Cindy read  two of her recent poems, "Time" & "Peace feels like…" - which began :

"Peace feels like …

A pair of old soft slippers mounded to the shape of our feet who

welcome us home with their warm embrace.

  I read

By the fireside

on the warmth of an embered evening,

eyelids heavier now

weighed down

craving after sleep,

I look into blue coals…"

Cindy sang bits of Aura Lea, Battle Cry of Freedom, and a long slow song with Shiloh in the title.

That was the first dinner party with friends (who weren’t family) in our house. [And, no, the Wiffe didn’t sing.  Her voice is awesome and she’s shy with it.)  Grace was no trouble, ate the meat and went off to sleep in our bed. Cindy & Adrian stayed overnight and went off at about 0900.  The boss is gone to town.  I’m still in my dressing gown and better get organised to go swimming with Grace.  I so love cooking.

I’ve never really liked them.  Always inclined to feel a duty to read them. Couldn’t bring myself to write one - even though I’m inclined to write at the drop of a hat. I’m a pretty kind person but the genre makes me cringe.

Until now.

Until I got one this year from one of my brothers… containing these words:

"… Travel is the ultimate leveler, the means of opening one’s eyes, the way to see others, the best book, the most scrumptious meal and we did it, Around the World, amidst the onset of the doom, the worst summer in memory and we survived to tell the tale!

"From the beauty and majesty of Botswana to the education and intimacy of Kruger to the noise and serenity of Bali, the colours, the smells, the seas, the architecture and peace throughout…. [his dots] to the simplicity of Hawaii, the diversity, the freshness, the values and awe of creation, to finally embrace SF, the commercial, the buzz, the laughter, the familiar and the value of family and friendship - we were so lucky and stand united in our thanks for being able to witness AND still be talking and loving one another."

This blew me away… the stream of consciousness, the rush of the senses, the celebration - Whitmanesque - between commas and the punch in the lines.

My great brother has changed my life, irreparably. 

A huge thanks to Linda Naiman  for this quote in her newsletter:

“What do most Nobel Laureates, innovative entrepreneurs, artists and performers, well-adjusted children, happy couples and families, and the most successfully adapted mammals have in common?

They play enthusiastically throughout their lives.

— What common denominator is shared by mass murderers, abused children, burnt-out employees, depressed mothers, caged animals, and chronically worried students?

Play is rarely or never a part of their lives.”

I’ve been taking photos during the evening class. 

Fortunately Stephen Bean, the lecturer, hasn’t minded. Neither have my classmates - or, if they have, they have suffered in silence.  I have a small collection of shots which will remind me of much more than their faces.

This is my favourite by a mile. 

It was taken last Thursday, when we met in Stephen’s studio - the one he built himself.  He’s such an inspiration.

I’ve promised to send this to my ‘model’…  I hope you like it, and, if you do, please leave a comment to let me know (a small favour please)…

And if you don’t like it, please say so too.

  I’m a beginner and need the critique to puncture my self satisfied grin.

"

But medical treatment for mental illness can be painful because of the hardcore aspect of the drugs.  In short: the side effects suck and something pissing about with your mind and motivation can be distressing as hell, take that from me. And mental illness is of the mind- no, the brain, which is an organ, too.  But unquantifiable.  So we can be sold anything and in desperation we can try anything, because there is no stick or thermometer to tell us if we’re better or not.  And we can be told that what is going on with us isn’t real in the first place (although to me, “real” just means “really affecting you, therefore if you want help with it, you should be offered it without judgment). 

I think that this rise of Pseudoscience is dangerous and damaging.  It relies on anecdotal evidence and is a growing, prosperous industry and that in itself is giving it unwarranted credibility.  In some cases it exploits people’s desperation.  And I don’t think that psychiatry or even science has all the answers but it is an arena that questions rather than anecdotally accepts.  I’d rather push forward in that direction of research into things that are working or work better than most than go backwards into the direction of New Age pseudoscience that says it should work because… well, it should.  Stick it up your chakras."

This is a long post.  I haven’t had time to re-read it.  What I love is the passion born of experience. And the challenge.

On my way home from town yesterday, I stopped off at Centra in Mayfield, to buy a pint of milk, as one does.

Old Moore’s Almanac 2009 caught  my eye.  The name was familiar.  The contents were not.  I thought "Um, I wonder how often that comes out? Probably every month.  I think it’s Irish but I don’t know anyone who’s ever mentioned it, let alone read it."

Even though it said 2009 on the cover, I persisted with the notion that it came out at least quarterly.  I saw "Poetry" on the cover, and that ignited a serendipitous connection. I’m going to label 2009 the Year of Putting My Stuff About (YPMSA).  Maybe Old Moore’s Almanac (OMA) was looking for me too?

It cost 4 euros - for an annual publication.  There won’t be another until 2010. Plenty of time to select the best poems to submit. But it’s a great 4 euro reference pamphlet. You won’t be disappointed or go round muttering that Omani must have shares in that rag.

"Old Moore’s Almanac has been published for nearly two and a half centuries."

Since 1764… founded by Theophilus Moore, known as "the Irish Merlin".  There is a FORWARD by Brendan Smith T.D. minister for agriculture, fisheries and food. The point I’m coming to is that there are predictions for each month in 2009:

• predictions about the global and Irish econony 
• predictions about Irish weather
• predictions about world and Irish sport

By the way, OMA is not to be confused with Old Moore’s Almanack.

By the way, OMA anagrams into…

 A damn oracle looms.

"One thing every writer should be thinking about is developing their web presence and talking about writing and the books that are reading - can only help! Blog, video, podcast - what ever you’re comfortable with.

For now, the rest is up to school visits, translations and other projects. Long term though - there is room for larger advances to authors/illustrators and increased bursaries to publishers. I think Sarah Webb said yesterday - her reason for approaching an English publisher was because they could offer her 10 times more than an Irish house. That is probably true of every Irish writer published in the UK."

This I lift from David Maybury’s very interesting blog. 

To which Liam said:

"… I couldn’t agree more. However, Irish people seem to be split into two camps, those who “get” the web and those who don’t. This runs through the gamut of Irish business, author’s and regular humans alike.

We’re obviously biased, but there are 2 Irish author’s that do get it, Darren Shan and Eoin Colfer both have the considerable marketing weight of their publishing houses behind them but still choose to engage with readers through their own websites.

There are huge opportunities for viral publicity through a mix of social media and community development that are just as accessible to new authors as well as established writers."

I put all this up to remind me how important it is to develop the interest of readers, so that when you go to a publisher you offer some reason why you might be worth publishing…

Which led me to "Creative Loafing" : I need to read this… and then address…

How could I raise my profile?

Suggestions please.

I’m looking for some curse words I’ve never heard before.  If anyone knows a good source, I’d be grateful.  The reason I’m looking is because I’m in the middle of writing a comedy script and one of the two characters swears a lot and I don’t want to bore the audience.

I’ve found one useful US site.

Laughter is the best medicine:  who first said that?

I went to the Aware xmas party last evening. 

Twas lovely.  My third.  It’s hard to believe that I’ve been to three in a row.

Last year I went, even though I was in the grip of severe depression.  I can’t remember much about it. The year  before, I was just experiencing the first light of recovery under the influence of a Zanex tablet. This year was the first time I’ve been to an Aware party in the whole of my health.

A pint, and a bit (courtesy of Garry), in a pub followed by a meal in a Chinese restaurant. 

The grand finale was the draw for xmas prizes.  Carol had gone around businesses in Cork collecting sponsored gifts.  She is amazing at bringing in the sponsorship, and I came home with :

• Four tickets for the Gate cinema and a box of chocolates to go with that

• Rugby’s Greatest Ever 20 Matches (DVD and little book set)

• An Oil/Vinegar Drizzler & Pasta Bowl from Marks & Spencer

• A pretty picture frame which takes a 4"x4" photo, and

• An AM/FM Curve Radio with LCD Alarm Clock 

Isn’t that great!  Rose give a short speech thanking everyone.

During the meal there was great fun at our table…

plenty of laughs and everyone looking relaxed in each other’s company.  We had a bond: we’d all experienced ‘mental illness’.  Some had been locked up against their will in mental institutions, some had voluntarily gone in, others had bi-polarity, more severe depression, others mild, and so on.  Some were fully recovered, others doing their best to cope…  We all knew we were completely accepted in that company.  There is nowhere I’ve felt more completely accepted than at Aware meetings.   Nowhere I can laugh at the ridiculousness of stigma as heartily.  Nowhere I can say that no one can stigmatise me if I don’t let them… and fully understand my clumsy prose.  For me, there is no better company than the company of people who have direct experience of mental illness.

There’s lots of other very good company.  There is company that is as good, but none better.

It’s the only Tuesday night in Cork when there isn’t a regular Aware self-help meeting.  If there is anyone reading this who’s been to Aware, or who’s helped someone go to Aware, I think you for all that you are and have given me.

May you have a good Christmas and New Year, and carry on with love into the future.

This is the first I’ve heard of Neurofeedback.

There is a video (8.5 minutes) on this blogpost which has wonderful graphics…

It’s given me plenty to think about, especially whether it might help me with long term relapse prevention - avoiding a recurrence of severe depression ?

Any of you know anything about it?  Is there a practitioner in Ireland or UK?