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View My Stats From Bath to Cork with Baby Grace :: November :: 2009
Depression & Health, Work & Play, Photography & TravelNovember 30, 2009 7:53 pm

I’ve gone to Kerry from Cork - to finish my part of the book on Depression.

There was no way I could have concentrated on it in Cork.  I hope that a few days here, in isolation, will be enough for me to sort out what I want to do with the 300 pages already written.

There are chapters to organise.  There are sections to prioritise. 

I’m writing in a writer’s retreat offered by a friend who lives in Brussels.  I’m boarding in a B&B in Caherdaniel.  I’m about to go out to a pub for an evening meal.

I’ll let you know how I get on.  I’ve said I won’t go home to omanimot & tot until it’s done.

I’ll take a few photographs if the weather tomorrow is anything like as splendid as today. 

Work & Play, Blogging & Media, Customer serviceNovember 27, 2009 9:01 am

Last night I was guest speaker at MUSTEL, a business forum in Cork, Ireland.

MUSTEL members come from many companies with suppliers, customers & shareholders from all over the world.  Even Apple was in the audience. 

I learned a lot about how to present "social media".  I presented to a group I’d never met before.  

I’d like to share with you my "learnings".  
Why? To make it easier for others to address this issue, especially in Ireland.  Here hardly anyone in business understands the social networking world that’s growing under our feet. [I asked if anyone had googled me to find out who I was.  One person had.]

There are loads of technical experts here.  Brilliant software designers. Hardly anyone who already behaving the message. People develop platforms for conversations, and then forget to walk the talk.

A summary of what I learned:

(1) Bring & use a digital recorder.  If you’ve a script & follow it carefully, you don’t need a recorder.  But if all you have is an intention to help your audience, who’s knows what you might say?Record your own performance.  That gives you material to share with others who weren’t there. You can broaden & deepen the conversation. So many meetings are never recorded…  So few people keep notes…  So many of us have lousy memories…  Don’t forget your digital recorder. [When I get my Apple iPhone, I’ll have all the technology I need.

(2) Don’t leave questions to the end.  Don’t talk at your audience about your passion - and exclude them.  While they sit waiting for you to stop, who know’s what they’re thinking.  They may be sitting there appearing to be at the presentation.  They may be tweeting away about football. When you’re in conversation with an individual, you can fairly easily tell when their mind is wandering, when they’re just being polite.  Don’t present from your little world.  Engage… Engage… Engage…  Never forget that every person in the audience wants you to engage with them.  And if the topic is "social media", they’ll judge the value of your words by your behaviour.

(3) Best conversations are when people trust each other.  As a presenter these days, you’re not trusted simply because you come with a powerpoint presentation.  There are so many powerpoints out there, I think people mistrust anyone who makes much use of powerpoint.  You have to make yourself naked.  Strip away the trappings, be incredibly honest with people in order to engage with them.  [It helped me last night that I’d had a really bad experience before coming, arrived late & was obviously not cool, calm and collected. Exposed as a bit of an ordinary guy, a bit like members of the audience.  No one told me that.  I simply suspect it.]  Best to remind yourself that this audience probably has no reason to trust you.  If you come from a business, they’re probably expecting you to try sell them something, to take advantage of them.

(4) Don’t sell. I told MUSTEL members I wasn’t willing to sell them my services as a consultant on social media. I do that for free.  The only thing I’d ever charge them for would be if they wanted to hire me as a writer.  I forgot to add I only do paid work for companies that I love.  We live in a world where selling has a bad name.  The skill we all need is ability to make it easy for others to consider whether to buy, or not to buy.  Selling gets in the way.

(5) Don’t ever leave after your presentation.  Hang around.  Be there when people relax.  People may give you the gift of a bit of direct feedback to your face.  Especially on social networking. Show you’re interested in the real world.  The audience last night contained one person who had a blog. Not one other person in the room had ever had their own blog. [I suggested they set one up for free  today.] Those of us "evangelists for the blog" know that everything hinges on the experience of blogging.  Unless you’ve had your own blog, you can’t work in social networking for your company.  I mean you can’t be any good at it.  Unless you have an extraordinary skill at empathy  with others. This is tricky to put across.

(6) Conversation is the name of the game.  People go back to a hotel because they had good conversation there.  People renew contracts because they enjoyed conversation about the old one. This is so radical a thought, it’s bound to be misunderstood.  I haven’t time to explain it now.  I offer it to you in the hope some of you will connect with the concept from your experience.  If I can help it, I only buy from those who offer me engaging conversation. [That doesn’t mean people who agree with me.]

Thank you MUSTEL.  
It was very good of you to invite me.  I’d bite your hand off if you invited me to come back in a year’s time for another conversation on the same topic.  It’ll be interesting to see how things have moved on in Ireland and wider world. If I wasn’t bothered about leaving a company out by mistake, I’d have publicly thanked each company in the room for such a kind reception.

 

Depression & Health, Work & PlayNovember 24, 2009 1:05 pm

A very emotional occasion.  Most valuable evening. Public lecture from AWARE in Cork

It was the Thursday when it rained and led the ESB to release water from their dam.  At one stage, it looked as if there would be no audience for Eddie Egan & David Carton.  A foul and drenching night to talk about depression.

But those are the kind of nights when the best things happen.

Eddie Egan, a psychotherapist, summarised his approach to a person in depression. I made notes as best I could.

(1) How depressed is the person?  Measurement is essential: Eddie uses a "depression inventory" to let people see where their feeling fall on a scale.  Some are relieved to see they are only 1/3 up the scale.

(2) No depressed person likes themselves.  Dislike of self, self-loathing, self-hatred - all feature highly in the minds of depressed people.

(3) Depressed people tend to isolate themselves: sit in their own rooms, walk down side streets, keep their heads down, avoid eye contract.  Eddie Egan strives to get people to lift their heads up "eyes up".  "You have to start somewhere."

(4) Goals matter: plan to achieve something, however small.

(5) Thinking & feeling are tied up together.  Eddie asks "What are you getting from being the way your are?"  "What are you losing?" "What do you want to change?"

(6) The belief of the therapist matters…  The therapist can keep the client stuck.  Eddie said he didn’t believe the chemical imbalance theory.  If the therapist subscribed to such a theory, they therapist could be responsible for keeping the client stuck.

(7) The belief of the client is also vital.  If the client believes they are stuck with depression for the rest of their life, that will influence the outcome. [I remembered the term ‘self-fulfilling prophesy‘]

(8) Start with what the person presents.  It’s never the full story but if you disregard the problem which they first present, you’ll find it hard to build the rapport you need to work together.

(9) Negative automatic thinking: the fuel for depression.   "Catch it.  Stop it.  Say ‘you’re doing the best you can’." 

(10) What the underlying issue?  It could be anything.  Something traumatic or something that seems trivial to another.  I remembered the phrase "non-judgmental acceptance": it seemed to fit what Eddie Egan was describing and advocating.

(11) Anxiety or Depression?  Eddie said he usually goes for what’s primary.  Focus on that… the other slips away.

(12) Catastrophic thinking: it’s all heading for an awful end… Eddie gave some lovely examples of the way people with depression think, the way their minds are taken over.

Questions from the floor:

One person said "sadly I don’t have the guts to kill myself" - what do you do with someone like that? While he was answering that, Eddie said "I (the therapist) don’t need to hear the story; the client might need to tell their story…"  For me, this is one of the key qualities of a good therapist: everything they do is designed to help the client.  The therapist has no need in the situation, except the desire to help. 

  • Someone who was in a mental hospital (or a mental health ward in the hospital) said "I got better after 12 days; they kept me in for 6 weeks…"

  • Confession came up:  is the decline of confession the removal of a great support?  To whom can you tell your story these days?
  • Drugs, of course drugs came up. Eddie Egan said "if you’re not on it, you don’t have to come off it." He also said he saw situations where short term use of a drug could help.  But there are people who think medication is the answer, "that leads to disappointment".

Afterwards

I asked Eddie Egan about where you could get therapy, counselling in Cork. He teaches on the "Counselling & Psychotherapy" BA honours course in Cork Institute of Technology (CIT). There are students in training who look for clients. Trainees are supervised and they charge a nominal rate.

He also said the Irish Association of Counselling & Psychotherapy (IACP.ie) website was a userul place to start looking for a therapist. 

I’ll put up a separate post about David Carton’s contribution. 

Depression & Health, Work & PlayNovember 18, 2009 11:04 pm

The world is a great mirror. It reflects back to you what you are. If you
are loving, if you are friendly, if you are helpful, the world will prove
loving and friendly and helpful to you. The world is what you are.

 Thomas Dreier 

For more information on this quotation and the author:
http://www.gurteen.com/gurteen/gurteen.nsf/id/L002536/

 Not only do I love this quote, but I went in search of the author and found many others.  Including this one

 "The life each of us lives is the life within the limits of our own thinking. To have life more abundant, we must think in limitless terms of abundance."


Depression & Health, Politics, Work & Play, Blogging & Media 7:50 pm

Today I came across a blog post that shook me so much I cut & paste it for you…

———————- 

 Drug industry writers behind some articles purportedly written by doctors [in USA]

Monday, Aug. 24, 2009 

A student who hands in a term paper under his own name, when in fact it had been written by someone else, has committed a serious breach of ethics.

The same is true for doctors who allow their bylines to appear above articles published in medical journals when in fact the articles were largely produced by ghostwriters pushing a product.

According to stories published Wednesday by The New York Times and the Associated Press (AP), many doctors have been persuaded by drug companies to cooperate on such articles.

A “sophisticated ghostwriting program” used by London-based drugmaker GlaxoSmithKline to promote an antidepressant pill called Paxil was an example given by Associated Press. Although the company says it has discontinued the ghostwriting program, the news service obtained court documents showing that it had used this marketing tactic.

The danger here is that doctors are trusted. Readers who see a doctor’s name atop an article about a certain drug are apt to believe what is being stated. They would certainly be more skeptical if they knew the article was actually written by people working for the company that makes the drug.

Ghostwritten articles on Paxil, which highlighted doctors as their authors, appeared in five medical journals from 2000 to 2002. AP reported that today hundreds of people are pressing personal injury and wrongful death suits against GlaxoSmithKline, claiming the company downplayed the risks of Paxil.

The (New York) Times disclosed that there is

a growing body of evidence suggesting that doctors at some of the nation’s top medical schools have been attaching their names and lending their reputations to scientific papers that were drafted by ghostwriters working for drug companies — articles that were carefully calibrated to help the manufacturers sell more products.

There are no laws prohibiting ghostwriting. But there is no question that the widespread practice is unethical and that universities and medical associations should crack down. We agree with a bioethics expert at Duke University who told the Times, “To blow this off is not acceptable.” [blow off = to ignore]

———————————-

I was so shocked to read that doctors had been signing their names to articles written by Drug companies, I left a comment on the blog. 

Is this happening in Ireland? 


Depression & Health, Work & Play, Customer service, Photography & Travel 11:54 am

I slept it out and missed my plane this morning.  

The alarm on my Nokia didn’t wake me.  Maybe it didn’t go off.  Maybe I didn’t set it right…

I stayed overnight in Bath with my dear friend Paul Cresswell. Was very tired going to bed and simply woke an hour after I was meant to.

Not RyanAir’s fault.

I has a hire car from Hertz.  Amazingly I was able to extend the hire for another day for £2. The Hertz woman looked at my RyanAir voucher, said she thought it might be that low but checked. Imagine a car hire for a day for less than a decent cup of coffee…

I’ve re-scheduled the next two days.  Arranged a meeting in Clarion Hotel Cork @ 1500 Friday. Apologised to Ken FitzGerald whom I’m meant to represent @BNI Phoenix Chapter tomorrow. (But I’m still looking for someone to cover for me, so that Ken isn’t left unrepresented at the business networking meeting.)

Discovered you pay £5 per hour for WiFi in Bristol Airport - but there are no signs to advertise this service.  [I suggested to the customer service person from Bristol Airport  they put some up. But she had no business card.] 

I settled down to recover.  Met a Newcastle Paul from Wharram Designs who’s got a client Sandford Care Village run by St Monica’s Trust.  This sounds like a great place for ageing people to live and be supported throughout the rest of their life.  He may be looking for a copywriter… You never know.

Now the Dell laptop battery is dying (running out).  There is no powerpoint anywhere near.

I’ve phoned Kava Media, one of my employers.  I’m off now to meet Richard Kennedy.  This is an unexpected opportunity to talk to him about the link between Kava Media & MarketWriteNow.  

Depression & Health, Work & PlayNovember 16, 2009 11:39 am

I got this (via Google Alert) link this morning: it’s an overview on depression.

On Thursday this week, AWARE are holding a public meeting in Cork [the first of many I hope].

Cork University Hospital Lecture Theatre
Thursday 19 November @ 8pm
 
Free Admission…. All Welcome..
 
Come early to be sure of getting a seat. 
 
ps  (David Carton has personal experience of Bipolar Disorder as a relative) 

 

Poetry, Art & Science, Work & Play, Children, Photography & Travel, History & Museums 9:38 am
 
The most popular stand was Blackrock Observatory. There was a queue to get into their ‘tent’.
 
Girl in awe
 
 
How similar are we to each other? 
 
omanitot loved this  
 
Slime-making was a huge attraction.
omanitot was introducted to this by @celav Marcela Whelan the organiser.
 
Depression & Health, Work & Play, Blogging & Media, Photography & TravelNovember 15, 2009 7:39 pm
 
This was the master plan.  Like Irish weather, it changed during the day. 
 
 
Ciara Feely (findaconferencevenue.com) worked hard… 
 
The notion of knitting while you un-conference amused & enthused me…
 
Sabrina Dent in full flight… 
 
 
Notes for the session I ran on "Mental Health: Madness & the Spirit of the Entrepreneur". 
 
Work & Play, Blogging & MediaNovember 14, 2009 11:34 pm

I’m not sure what this means yet… Perhaps someone could interpret it for me…?

  • Google PageRank: 4
  • Google Links: 254
  • Yahoo Links: 8,360
  • MSN Related: 59
  • Technorati Links: 1,540
  • Google indexed pages: 987
  • Subdomains: 1

Depression & Health, Work & Play, Blogging & MediaNovember 12, 2009 8:33 am

The idea of BarCamp is crazy.  A self proclaimed un-conference.  A Cork gathering of people who’re really fed up with the conventional process that dominates conference practice.

This lot are going to have a day when anything goes.  Minimal structure.  Free flow of ideas and fun if you ask me.

It’s fitting it should be in the Cork International Airport Hotel (or is that the Cork Airport International Hotel?).  That’s a hotel with zappy design - the hotel that hosted Irish Blog Awards 2009 - the Damian Mulley inspired (and he also did heaps of the graft behind it).

I have to prepare for it.  I’m presenting a session.  Offering a session.  You might say selling a session.

I’ll be given a starting time.  A space.  It’ll be up to what happens next whether anyone will come or stay.  People might come, look in & move off to something that interests them more.  It may be a bit like Hyde Park Corner, soapbox stuff.

I blame @patphelan.  He’s the one who hooked me on this, get me to take a look at BarcampIII.  As soon as I looked at the website and some of the blog comments there, I got this mad idea to present something.

A more judicious person would have gone this year, sussed it out and maybe delivered a session in 2010.  Only there may never be a 2010.  For all we know no one may have a 2010.  I didn’t want to assume that I could do it next year.

Do it now.  It screamed at me.  Thought cried out from the depths of experience, and I remembered all those horrendous bouts of severe depression which stopped me in the past.

I got mad enough to put up a session called

"Mental Health : madness and the entrepreneurial spirit".

It may be the only topic on which I’m qualified to speak. 

Poetry, Art & Science, Work & Play, Photography & Travel, History & MuseumsNovember 9, 2009 4:16 pm
A few hours ago I had the privilege of capturing these two heads together
Gerry Murphy  & Donal Casey (who says he’s a man of no importance)
Depression & Health, Work & Play, Children, Blogging & Media, Customer service, Photography & Travel, Food & DrinkNovember 6, 2009 10:40 am

My new business partnership with Gwenda Hughes of Dragon Marketing has started.

It’s absorbed loads of energy & time.  We [DragonMarketing&CopywritingServicesInternational] decided to go in for CorkMeet2009 - a business opportunity to meet new customers, partners and friends.

I never realised there was so much involved in setting up a new business properly - including dropping that mad name.

The implications for this omaniblog are clear: I must do all my work related writing on the blog of the new website.  It needs content.  And there’ll probably be a monthly business newsletter coming out of there too. (Got to earn more money… Minister Lenihan and sidekick Cowen are ready to make that even more necessary.)

So will "From Bath to Cork with Baby Grace" be for all my non-work stuff?

No. I don’t find the dichotomy between work and non-work helpful.  I work hard at having fun, being a dad, a husband, a good friend, a worthwhile companion,a coffee drinker & being angry about the state of the Irish body politic.

It’s all work to me.

So there’ll always be a fuzzy boundary with cross-over.  

I might as well accept that.  I spent long enough, years ago, organising my life into silos…  Trying to keep everything in separate compartments did me no good (but it has given me a fund of funny stories about how ridiculous the mind can be if you let it get the better of you.)

This blog will be mainly about mental health, being a father, the practice of focusing & continuing interest in food, writing poetry…

Of course, I’d love you to take a look at the new business website (MarketingWriteNow.com), but I won’t be using this place to flog it. 

All I’ll be hoping is that you leave a comment there on the blog and say what your first impression is. 

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